Tuesday, March 07, 2006

Afterlife Judgement Question


For the sake of argument, let's assume that you belong to a religion that considers suicide -for any reason- to be a mortal sin, tantamount to murder and worthy of eternal damnation. Let's also assume that you are Judged by some demi-god type at the time of your demise and sent to the appropriate afterlife at the whim of this entity. Just pretend.

In this rosy little scenario you have nonetheless become so overwhelmed with despair that you've lost faith and have decided to throw yourself in front of the next train that comes along. This will be your first-ever Mortal sin.

You make that final not-long journey down to the tracks. Despite your suicidal gloom you cannot help cracking "light at the end of the tunnel" jokes and giggling to yourself while you wait for a train to finish you off.
You are really weird and will never be loved , you have decided.
You are at least half correct.

The sound of a distant whistle rouses you from this unhealthy reverie. You are getting ready to be flattened by a locomotive-the time for critical self-evaluation is long past.

The cold steel rails are starting to hum, then buzz . When you round the next corner, there'll likely be a diesel-powered deathwish headed right at you.
Shit.
You'll probably go to Hell. Can it be worse than this? Oh woe! The self-pity just makes you hate yourself more. You are spending your last scant seconds of life on self-doubt and inward loathing.
That sucks. No wonder no one loves you.

WAIT!

There's a kid playing on the tracks in front of you. He must be deaf- or perhaps he's even more depressed than yourself- but he's oblivious to the now-blaring train's horn and the fifty-ton engine behind it.

Wow, you think, what a great opportunity! You can push the kid out of the way and get yourself smooshed-up at the same time. Everyone wins.
You shove the kid. Hard.
The kid tumbles downhill into a thicket of brambles and rusty Korean War-surplus barbed wire. He's safe from the train.

At the last second it dawns on you - you have saved a human life.God loves you. You are an important person and someday you might find the earthly love and happiness you deserve. Maybe this suicide isn't exactly what...

You should have been moving instead of thinking. The train smears you along ninety yards of track.

So up you go to be judged.

Where are you sent?
Good place or Bad?

7 comments:

Amy said...

is there an option C?

Allan said...

I hope so.

Susannity said...

i guess it depends on which belief system you follow. he didn't have time to repent for the sinful thought so down he goes. he did a good deed that accidentally resulted in his death so up he goes.
here's my plan c, dude dies, dude gets buried or cremated, dude is hopefully remembered by those who survive him, dude is clueless cause he's dead.

STAG said...

Bad


How hard was that?????

Allan said...

Bingo Stag!
He read the first paragraph:

"For the sake of argument, let's assume that you belong to a religion that considers suicide -for any reason- to be a mortal sin..."

So it's off to Hell with our sad protaganist. This demonstrates what a pitiless and unjust "God-thing" people are willing to worship- only an utter bastard would condemn our hapless hero to the Pit just for being hopelessly depressed by this Shitworld...
It's reason #1 why I don't believe in that God.

em0 said...

Lets start a new religion. Where people respect eachother in a groovy way. And you don't go to hell if you commit suicide, are gay, do abortion or any pther thing. And equal rights for every one.

Oh wait. Isn't there something called that? Like.. Logic and sense?

Allan said...

Let's call it atheism and not go to church or to hell.