Progress Report

Tomorrow Gen. David Betraeus and American Ambassador Lyin' Crocker are scheduled to lie to the American public regarding the current state of the Iraqi occupation.

What lies will they tell? The same ones we've heard before.

They will tell us that progress is being made in Iraq.

This is true if you are a Shiite insurgent- the forces of rebel cleric Moktada al-Sadr fought Puppet Minister Nuri al-Maliki's Iraqi Army to a bloody standstill last week during a poorly conceived military 'crackdown' on Sadr's private army in Basra...the operation didn't accomplish much except to prove that the Iraqi Army (and Maliki's government ) are helpless without U.S. air and ground support.
The recent battle also helped create and widen internecine divides within the Shiites themselves, thus making any future reconciliations more difficult- neighbor kills neighbor, brother kills brother...grudges were formed, to say the least.

The Iranians have also made considerable progress in Iraq, a nation which they have historically been at odds with...Maliki's Puppet Ministry is openly sympathetic to Iran's government; Saddam was not.

Gen. Betraeus and Mr. Crock will certainly point out that Mr. Maliki's government is not capable of standing on it's own and they will doubtlessly use that observation as part of their rationale for continuing the Iraqi occupation - what they won't give us is a 'timetable' as to when the civic miracle of Iraqi sovereignty will occur.

No one knows for certain when that will happen. But we do know when it won't happen. Peace won't break out while Iraq is occupied by a foreign power-Iraq will remain in a state of anarchistic violence as long as we stay there. As long as we stay, there will be war. There's no way to tell how long-or even if- a peace can be established, but it won't even start until we bring our troops home.

Imagine if you were given a project at work and you turned it in without finishing it, crying exultantly, "mission accomplished!"...five years later your boss is still asking you when you will be finished and all you can say is: "hey man, I'm workin' on it...all I need is more time. And a raise."
You'd be fired.

Five years have passed and we are still dropping bombs in the hearts of Iraqi cities.
From any perspective this is a failure and it will get worse before it gets better.

If we pull out our troops, Mr. Maliki and his Puppet ministers will probably be executed by their own people- history doesn't look kindly on wartime collaborators. Tough shit.

If force was capable of spreading 'freedom' it would have worked already- if the Persians wanted Western democracy, they could have adopted it from the Greeks two thousand years ago.
Or, more recently, from the British- we all remember how well the British occupation of the Middle East worked out, right?
Right?
Obviously not.
I mean, who could have foreseen any of the troubles that we, as the invader, have faced in the Middle East?
The Crusades went so smoothly, after all. No trouble there...man, the whole thing shoulda been a cakewalk, just like establishing Israel was...I mean, that went off without a hitch or complaint, right?

Ooops.
What I meant to say is that 60 years after establishing 'freedom' in Israel, we are still trying to stop the violence there and the best solution anyone seems to have come up with involves concentration camps, a segregated population and the copious use of armed force backed with an implied nuclear threat, three things that just scream ' freedom'...it's a wonder that the Liberty Bell doesn't shatter from the the stress of ringing out all that freedom.


Perhaps we will be told that the world is a better place without Saddam Hussein in power.

I challenge anyone to provide one concrete example to support that claim- just saying "he was a bad man" isn't good enough- how exactly is the world a better place? Be specific.

There were 631 reported incidents of Iraqi violence in March, up from 239 the previous month...at the time , the 'low' number of 239 was held up as sign of progress- only 239 attacks in a month, that's less than 10 bombings per day!

How many car bombs does it take to ruin one's day?

4.5 million Iraqis have fled their homeland. I suppose an optimist could say that Saddam never would have granted 4.5 million travel visas, but those Iraqis aren't on vacation, they are wartime refugees. What sort of 'progress' creates 4.5 million refugees?

Iran's theocratic leaders were held in check by Saddam's secular regime and vice-versa- Presidents Reagan, Bush 41 and Clinton all knew and understood this- the USA has a long history of supporting both sides of the perpetual conflict between Iran and Iraq because it served our interests to do so- Saddam also kept al-Queda from establishing a presence in Iraq...when Iraq invaded Kuwait during Bush 41's term, Osama bin-Laden contacted the Kuwaiti government and offered the services of his own private army to expel the Iraqi invaders; at the time, bin-Laden's Mujahadeen warriors were basking in the glow of their recent victory over the Soviet Union in Afghanistan, (a feat they accomplished with considerable American help) and were itchin' for a fight with Saddam, who al-Queda saw as a Westernized infidel who refused to pay proper tribute to their call for Fundamentalist rule...the Kuwaiti's rejected bin-Laden's offer but there was a lot of bad blood between Saddam and bin-Laden ; the Mujahadeen were not allowed in Iraq- until we invaded and opened the door for them-
before the U.S. invasion, an al-Queada agent would have been safer in Bush's Kansas than he would have been in Saddam's Iraq.

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Speaking of Fundamentalist rule, I used to live in Utah, circa 1984 and this group was one of the worst-kept public secrets I've ever encountered...I mean, everyone in Utah knew what their deal was ; every once in a while they'd make the news and would be pressured to re-locate to a locale that was more inclined to ignore polygamy, rape, pedophilia and forced marriages- these areas of America are more common than I'd like to believe-first Utah, then Colorado, then Arizona...now Texas has them. They can hold 'em for all I care.

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Speaking of progress:

-I did not and will not get a new PC anytime soon. That offer was withdrawn due to another family crisis. I can't go into that now.

-I had two job interviews last week but no job offers. I'm borrowed-out and flat broke. I need new shoes, new clothes, new food...new everything. I'm willing to work for them but no one is hiring...America just lost another 150,000 jobs over the last 45 days. In 1999 I made $25/hr...the best offer I've had this year was $8. It's a good thing that the cost of living has also dropped by 2/3 or I'd be at serious risk of losing my apartment.
I have been homeless before but it was brief and it was by my own choice...the next time promises to be neither.

- There are options to homelessness. The last time I was facing the street life here in Fallentown, I found a girlfriend with a house and moved in with her. She turned out to be a drug-dealing psychopath with shady connections to the world of professional art thieves. She also had a semi-domesticated pet wolf that was prone to killing the neighbor's pets and when we broke up she tried to 'sic' the wolf on me but I was one of the only humans it liked and I escaped unmauled.

- My ex-girlfriend once tried to kill me with a wolf. How much worse could it get?
I'm dating again, so I'm pretty sure that I'm going to find out.

Ebony and Irony

I hadn't realized what an utter piece of garbage our old turntable mixer (above, right) was until I got a chance to play with our new one...yep!
New one!
This morning there was a piece of gear in the studio that I'd never seen before- a shiny DJ mixer! Woot! Fancy!
No one had sent out an email or called me, so I was surprised as holy heck to see it...I cued up a record, pressed a few buttons, plugged in the headphones...
Cool!
It has a much better sound than the old one, I could hear the difference straightaway- it has long been a source of considerable consternation to me that my records sound better at home than at the station... why is that?...it's the mixer, duh!

There isn't much that makes me happier than new audio gear.
I was clapping my hands together in glee.
Serious glee, I'm tellin' ya.
The sort of joy that transcends dignity.
*Squeal!*

I pointed the new gizmo out to the early morning DJ, but he doesn't play vinyl. He didn't care. He hadn't even noticed it, his loss...I really wanted to share this happy moment with somebody...but who to tell?

Voila!

In walks one of our nighttime DJs.

"Hey man!", I said,"Have you seen this? This new mixer is cool!"

"Um, yeah. I came in to switch it."

"Switch it?"

"Yeah. It's mine. I left it here last night."

So with under a minute to spare, he replaced the new mixer with the old one.
I cued up another record.
It sounded like shit.

The New Breakfast Snob, Nov. 25, 2007:

Funkadelic- Grooveallegiance
Pledge allegiance to the Funk! The equipment fiasco had threatened to derail my groove train, so some serious action was needed...

Osibisa- Move On
OK. This has cowbell, it helps me rock steady... speaking of helping ,Cowbell has posted details on how you can send gifts directly to the troops in Iraq- and a story that might move you to do so.

Larry Graham- Can't Stand The Rain
This morning we had a brief but heavy pelting of hail, which soon turned into a dreary drizzle, which may or may not have cleared up by now...I'm too goddamn gloomy to be bothered to look outside my window-and my window is directly behind my monitor...I'm that depressed.

Kinks- Sleepwalker
This is one of the very first records that I bought with my own money. I wonder if I will ever have my own money again...my unemployment runs out next week, just in time for X-mas...please Godzilla, I'm an adult now- no more retail...no more foodservice...no warehouses...where are the 'real' jobs? The kind you can blog from, I mean.

Soweto Gospel Choir- Paradise Road
Geez, I should stop complaining...it could be worse. I could be in Soweto- or Baghdad.

Stewart Copeland- Gong Rock
Ex-Police drummer's solo album is so good it almost takes my mind off of war and poverty...where is Klark Kent when you need him?

Kraftwerk- Das Model
I start thinking of Africa...and Germans...African Campaign...1941 all over again...Desert Fox...Rat Patrols...make it stop...

Gong-Can You:You Can
I can say that I am truly grateful that I saw Gong perform in Baltimore, Md., many, many years ago...they were great.

Can- Halleluwah
Can't say I saw Can. Fives times fast.

Stewart Copeland- African Dream
According to the computer, I had four on-line listeners...if you add that number to the number of people listening on the FM dial, it's probably closer to a half-dozen than it is to four.

Soweto Gospel Choir - African Dream
You can't spell 'Soweto' without 'Stew', as in Stew Copeland, who we just heard do a different song with the same name as this one. Circular, maaaaan...like a globe, duuuude.

Nina Hagen - African Reggae
Whatever Nina has to say, she says it in German...a Teutonic tantrum invoking Ras Tasfari. That might seem a bit ironic , but it's nothing compared to this:

The new Will Smith movie, I am Legend, is a re-make of a Charlton Heston flick, The Omega Man, based on Richard Matheson's 1950's sci-fi novel, I am Legend.
In The Omega Man, Heston's Lone Gunman killed a lot of vampires...Charlton's character also had interracial consensual necrophilia with an Afro-Vampire, which was pretty hot stuff for a future NRA figurehead to be involved in...I wonder what Heston would say if he found out that the Hollywood Jews gave his job to a black man?
He'd be happy, I think. Chuck marched with MLK and was an ardent civil-rights activist.
Who knew? Let's give some props to Charlton Heston!
It's a madhouse!!!



Joe Strummer- Get Down Moses

Charlton Heston once played Moses in the film version of a different sci-fi book. In the book, the Moses role was originally intended for a non-white man, so I think it's only fair that Smith gets the Omega Man gig...I wonder if Will's romantic interest will be a White Zombie?



Moody Blues- Dear Diary
Woke up late, wasn't were I should have been...what's happening to me?

Rickie Lee Jones- Runaround Rorschach
Ink blot romance. Welcome back.

Blonde Redhead- Four Damaged Lemons
Damaged lemons? Make broken lemonade.

Manfred Mann- Fritz the Blank
On the 'fritz', i.e., broken, damaged- plus a Germanic reference in the names, get it?...oh, never mind. Go back to sleep.

Loreena McKennitt- Gates of Istanbul
I sure wish she'd play somewhere around here. I'd pay if I could.

Quiet Sun-Bargain Classics
Classic early Brian Eno appearance- bought last summer for three bucks: a bargain!

Emerson, Lake & Palmer- When the Apple...
Quite possibly the longest song title ever. I'm not typing it all. I'm not even reading it.
Listen, yes. Type, no.

Soft Machine- As Long As He Lies Perfectly Still
Gong's Daevid Allen briefly played with an early incarnation of Robert Wyatt's Soft Machine...the Soft Machine served as opening act on a Jimi Hendrix tour- one of those concerts was in Richmond. I was too young to attend the Hendrix show, but I saw Allen in Maryland; that's as close to Hendrix as I'm likely to get.

Altan- Beidh Aonach Amarach
I can't pronounce this but I really enjoy it.

Fairport Convention- Now Be Thankful
A belated tip-o-the-hat to Turkey Day.

Jethro Tull- Up To Me
Take you to the cinema, leave you in a wimpy bar, You tell me that we've gone too far, come runnin' up to me...up to me.

It's up to us. 2008 will be a New Year, dammit!

Fiona Joyce- Cry Over You
Who filled your head with this 'freedom' stuff?



Pretty Things- Old Man Going
S.F. Sorrow is one of the first 'concept' albums, ever. It's a musical narration of the sad, lonely and wholly insignificant life of Sebastian Francis Sorrow...first, war fucks him up, then his lover dies in a dirigible explosion which S.F. witnesses...broken, he falls in with a bad lot and eventually an aged and withered Sorrow finds himself sitting on a park bench, sharing fulsome wine with Aqualung.
No one cares.
The End.




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TRICK HAPPY ENDING:
In 1998, the Pretty Things re-united and performed the entire S.F. Sorrow album live at London's Abbey Road studios; it was broadcast on the BBC and released as a limited-edition CD that features the entire original band, with Arthur "Fire" Brown as narrator and Pink Floyd's David Gilmour on guitar.


Cool , eh?

Don't Count Your Puppies Until They Hatch

I got offered a job today. I even started it, but I don't know if I'll keep it. The manager wasn't sure what my pay rate was- eventually we reached the owner on the phone and he informed me that my hourly wage was $8, which, multiplied by 40 and zapped by taxes is roughly 1/3 less than I need to survive- rent , bills food etc, much less live.

I was speechless.

I haven't worked for under $10 an hour since...I dunno. High School?
Yeah, if I sell a $2500 amplifier, I'd have a decent check- that week- but that doesn't happen every week. I'm leery of the idea of commission sales. I love to bullshit in person and on-line, but somehow it just never lends itself to making money. I'm just not a good salesman, I am afraid.

Today I sold a pair of drumsticks. That's about 35 cents commission, think.
I need to have a talk with my new boss.

All I'm really interested in selling is my time. I'm think of revising my resume to read:

Objective: To sell my time to the highest bidder. My time is available in 40-hour weekly blocks on a self-renewing basis. During these purchased block of time, I will do anything reasonable that is asked of me and I will do it well. In return for doing that, I would like to receive at least $500 per 40-hour block and, oh yeah, some health insurance.

Is that too much to ask?

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Geez, the e-search continues to haul in a bounty of spamourus come-ons...this most recent one even admits to being illegal (comments mine):

... On August 4th of 2003 I returned from vacation to discover the company I had started 9 years EARLIER would be 100% out of business on August 25th!

My company was in the business of faxing a daily comic relief news fax to about 8,000 offices in the Virginia Beach area. Offices loved to read it with the morning coffee (they did? we used to hate spam faxes), and we made good money selling advertising on it. But the Federal Communications Commission's new regulation made it "unlawful" after August 25th, 2003.
.

Coincidentally, the FCC passed regulations banning unsolicited 'junk' faxes from being sent to unwilling recipients on Aug 25th, 2003. If the offices were enjoying the morning fax so much, they could have signed up for it- the fact that they didn't leads me to conclude his ' comic relief' faxes were unwanted, ad-based spam.

Fax spam was "unlawful", i.e, illegal- this guy's business was sending 8,000 spam faxes a day and selling ad space on the spams -probably counting every fax # as several 'readers' when quoting circulation figures to client/dupes.

The FCC made the practice illegal because it was tying up business fax lines; wasting gobs of paper, time, productivity and resources etc...eventually enough businesses complained and the FCC was forced to act.

The spam lobby tried and failed to defeat this regulation, and they did get an extension until 2005, by which time the rise of email had rendered fax spam largely irrelevant...anyway, I , like most folks, detest spammers- and this guy is asking me to 'work' for him!
By paying him to send spam for me!
What a great deal.

See, deep down, he's a soft-hearted , sensitive guy who cares about his people:

About one week into shutting down the company, my office manager was crying at her desk, I tried to encourage her, but all she could mumble was, "there aren't enough jobs out there, I can't afford to work for $8 an hour (I know), those are the only jobs I'm finding"

I felt responsible, so I came up with an idea, "Suzy, give me your resume and cover letter and I'll fax it to all the offices that get our comic relief fax" We faxed it to all the offices (that was over 8,000 offices) and we were blown away by the response!

He spammed all the offices that it had become illegal to send ads to, but he didn't send ads- he sent his employee's personal info instead.
I need a job really, really badly, but I'm not sure I want to spam 8,000 offices with unsolicited copies of my resume.

According to Fax Man, you can expect 1 phone call for every 100 faxes you pay him to send out. He suggests sending at least 5,000.
He gives discounts for quantity.

5,ooo fax spams, with a cover sheet on each, wastes at least 10,000 sheets of paper on the receiving end. That's two cases of paper. I'm no Ed Begley, but I am uneasy with such a cavalier waste of paper in my name- my name printed on each sheet!

Is this what 21st century job-searching is all about? Paying spammers to put your resume on their mailing lists? I'd bet that your own info gets placed on a 'for-sale' mailing list as soon as you sign up.

Yep, he will send your resume to one of his many mailing lists. For a nominal service charge.

I'm not even sure if this is legal, I guess it is, but it seems phishy to me... according to his site, the fax will appear to have come from YOU...I wonder if that makes you complicit should it actually be a crime?

I'm sick of all this. I want to work, not send my phone number to 50,000 strangers.

Hmmm...I wonder how much it would cost to fax a Xerox of my ass to 100,000 office drones? That almost might be worth it.