I Like Hate Mail

I haven't gotten any good hate mail for a long time- not since the 2004 elections, in fact- so I was surprised to see this waiting for me- read it at 5:45 am , got my morning going, it did:

"I think people in general are the more disgusting ones here. Do possums naturally breed in dumpsters? No. The dumpsters are there because humans put them there. Humans are fucking up the Earth, spreading disease worse than "pests", throwing trash everywhere and destroying the environment for other animals, like possums, that had claim to the land first. I severely hope Karma bites you and the entire human race in the ass, and soon. It might wake you all up to reality."

I have mentioned that the word "possum" was one of my biggest internet traffic drivers (Beta labelers take note!) and it still is - the person above is referencing this post, which is my all-time 'most-viewed' - why , I don't know.

You can read the whole comment there, if you care.

The commenter is obviously a lot smarter than I am.

I thought dumpsters grew on trees and possums were manufactured in factories- apparently I have it backwards- thanks for the correction.

"The dumpsters are there because humans put them there."
Gee. I thought they were there because we had a rainy spring and they fucking grew. Now that I know what horrors dumpsters really are, I will start throwing my garbage onto your front lawn instead.

Soon you will have many adorable possums of your own.

A human who talks about possum's "claim to land" is like a snake kvetching about infringing upon the rights of a field mouse- who or what died so that you could live where you live?
What do you eat?
Where do you shit?
How do you get from A to B? A car, perhaps?
Are you suffering terminal species guilt?
You write as if humans are the 'other'- perhaps you are a character from Watership Down?

Nah, because then you would have realized that the pic of the "Dutch Possum" is actually a rabbit- you might have noticed that the 'Mississippi Possum' is an elderly blues musician- you might have noticed that in the first few sentences I am actually trying to free a trapped possum and I- the real-life I- am pissed at whoever killed the poor ugly fucker.

You missed all those clues.

I am sick of self-righteous , clueless motherfuckers who have their heads so far up their own asses that they couldn't see daylight if the Sun went supernova, telling other people how they need to live, how to think, what to do - I see you, furtively ducking into McDonald's -"it's just a milkshake", you say, "there's no meat..."

That is your argument- meatless.

I imagine you are one of those folks who runs around from blog to blog , meet-up to meet-up, looking for somewhere to spew your opinions, even if they aren't relevant,solicited or welcome- when you aren't busy talking about what a good person you are, that is, and I'm sure you are fond of doing that.
Talk is cheap - you, however, are priceless.

"I severely hope Karma bites you and the entire human race in the ass, and soon. It might wake you all up to reality."

"Severely hope?" Fuck, that almost sounds like something Pogo would say.
If you are Pogo, my severe apologies- I didn't know. I am a big fan.

If you are not Pogo, you are an idiot.

Speaking of Missing The Point, wishing ill upon others is Bad Karma.


Have a Nice Day.