Do possums attack people?According to Google , there are 87,400 answers to this question and answers #1 and #2 are both provided by this blog.
My site meter tells me that, on average, three people per day visit this site asking : do possums attack people?
The answer is : No.
Unless they have rabies.
Or are cornered. Or hungry.
Or mutants.
Why are they asking this question anyway? It's the sort of question most people would only ask when confronted with a snarling possum; by which time it's usually too late to cry for help, much less go on-line and Google "do possums attack people?"
I mean, have you ever seen a possum snarl? Of course not. No one living has.
According to one expert , human encounters with possums lead to over 2 million fatal attacks per year. These attacks are almost invariably fatal only to the possum.
In one of his lesser-known experiments, Nik Tesla discovered that possums possess an acute sensitivity to minute changes in the Earth's magnetic field, such as those produced by solar flares on our own sun.
Shortly before he vanished while demonstrating a prototype 'time weapon' to the U.S. military, Tesla established a link between increased solar activity and unusual possum behavior. He observed that during periods of flare-ups, the possums outside his squalid New York boarding house would engage in otherwise unheard of behavior, such as devouring automobile tires and holding strange marsupial orgies involving ceremonial headgear and human sacrifice. He speculated that possums could be exposed to a combination of solar radiation and negative energy and transformed into 'electro' warrior-animals designed to act as advance troops in the obsolete art of trench warfare.
This idea was rejected by officials from the U.S.A., England and the Soviet Union, who were more interested in developing tanks, planes and artillery. Tesla's research into weaponized possums was lost when he vanished nearly two years later.
So, no. Possums don't attack people. But they very well could have.
24 comments:
Once a baby possum found its way into my home, and actually burrowed under my bedsheets to have a nap (not while I was in there thankfully).
When I discovered it, it did the scary openmouthed hissing thing, and I ran away. But then I came back with gloves on and a cardboard box, confronted it again, and managed to pick the thing up by its tail - it hung there helplessly! - I put the upstart into the box and drove with it about a mile away from my house, then released him into a scruffy patch of woods near the train tracks.
The point is, ..I forget. Possums are pretty harmless.
Hey I intended to come down to the station this Sunday morning, to learn the tricks of being a WRIR DJ ,but forgot to ask in advance - maybe next weekend?
what I find weird is when people Google something as if they actually expect Google to answer the question, like a virtual research librarian or something. "Do possums attack people?" Like Google's actually going to come back with, "Why yes, Ted, possums actually do attack people in limited circumstances. Thank you for your inquiry."
Why not just Google "possums attack people"? I get weird searches on my stats pretty much every day. Like today, someone found my blog by searching for "I need to type some more shit with my keyboard". What the hell? Also someone searched for "Women in tights fucking men". Weird. But at least they didn't search for "Do women in tights need to type some more shit on their keyboards while fucking men?"
OK, I really need to go to bed, don't I? My daughter has a stuffed possum that she sleeps with. Toy, not taxidermy. It has not attacked her to date.
S- Dude, that 'open-mouth hissing' is possum-speak for: "I am the Possum Djinni and I am here to grant you three wishes"...you released it near the train tracks? Possums are magnetic- they stick to railroad tracks! It's why they're extinct.
This week was rough- everything broke! ...maybe next ?
MC- The only sure way to know if a possum is gonna attack is to fuck with it until it calls "Uncle!" or you lose a limb, whichever happens first.
You asked:
"I need to type some more shit with my keyboard". What the hell?'
A: I bet that was someone sitting in a cube somewhere, trying to look busy.
-I'm glad you clarified that "stuffed" bit, heh!
tesla was genius, too bad westinghouse shortchanged him and that prick marconi swindled him.
sheesh... thank goodness... you know, i was just about to get worried when i realised south africa doens't have any possums!
Does all of this also apply to the Irish version of this animal, namely, the O'Possum?
And if not, why not?
ok, you said "unless" so that is to say that they do--sometimes.
Just my opinion -- i love to debate
Angel- Are you sure?
CD- No. Irish need not apply.
CM- Debate what? I made all that stuff up.
opossoms are almost as dumb as armadillos...and racoons...which you will find as road kill along any major or country road..
I have eaten opossom before...it's oily ...doesn't taste like chicken..if my cat little asshole doesn't shape up..I will also be able to tell you what pussy taste like...hmm, maybe I should rephrase that..
Snatch the little bastards up by the tail,and deposit them on the neighbor's lawn..Piece o' cake...KITTENS on the other hand!..
oooer... you know something i don't?
JS- Hey! I was once outsmarted by a raccoon...what does that say about me?
Sling- We don't have lawns here. I'll give the next one I catch $1.25 and put it on a bus to the suburbs.
Angel- Unless you are a telepath, yes.I think South Africa used to have possums, but that was before Australia seceded from Pangaea. It's been a few years.
Ummm 2 things..
1: why the fuck would you know their habits so intimately..
2: .. isnt it Oppossum??
If an attack was imminent I would 'play dead'.
I have Raccoons in my backyard almost every night and I know that I look like a giant juicy Crawdaddy to those vicious little bastards.
I would have never connected Tesla with Possums. Ever. Did you see David Bowie's stint as Tesla in the Prestige?
F-
1. Because I am am expert. Didn't you see all my links?
2.It can be, but that's a waste of vowels.
H- Ha! Just remember to cover yer privates if ya play dead around savage possums.
I never would have connected Bowie with Tesla.
I don't know, Allan, possums scare me a little. All those razor sharp teeth! But I have found when I do encounter one, they don't try to attack me. And, to be fair, I don't try to attack them.
CS- Black Widows are scarier but easier to kill...the only true thing in my post was the Google link- and even that is no longer accurate. I'm not really an expert,but I think possums rarely, if ever, attack humans. Defend- maybe. Attack? Not so much.
I have been almost attacked by a possum I found in our chichen house. He tried to leap at me and go for my juggular vein. It's true.
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Over the last few weeks some Possums have taken to invading the land around my home. We live in the city and I have a couple small dogs as well as young Yellow Lab. So of course I was concerned to a degree. While it's true most often Possums do not attack, I myself have been confronted by more then one.
Once hiking I cam upon one at night which growled (of sorts) at me and came slowly at me. No big deal I just walked away.
Another time during the day I found one while hiking and it too growled, hissed and the like at me. It's more likely rapid and again no big deal I could just leave the area.
This brings me to the other day. Late evening, I'm mowing the lawn when I found on waking up from it's daily nap. This one was pretty growly and hissy and my neighbor and I decided it needed to be dealt with. So I got a shovel and try to poke it and get it to run off. It wouldn't leave and I couldn't catch it. In fact this NOT AT ALL RABID possum charged me. I flipped it back with my shovel and then 'Dealt' with it in a manner that sent it flying a foot into the air and landing on it's head. It sat there for a moment then looked up and looked around saw me and laid back down. I thought maybe I didn't hit it hard enough, but figured it got the point... It did not.
It charged me again, enough to scare my neighbor, I was surprised at how fast it moved. it was at my feet in a split moment, I kicked it like a soccer ball and hit it as hard as I could. It didn;t get up. It did however leave a small mark on my boots where it bit the toe.
While it;s true I've had more then just these encounters with these little buggers, at these moments I'm reminded that, YES at times some possums do attack.
Now this brings me to tonight. I found a young possum my Lab was barking at. I took a photo as it was in a tree, and it then growled at me, I was standing right by the branch it was on, and it didn't play dead. In fact it moved towards me. After I backed off it started to move up the tree, where it turned out that 2 other possums were hiding, they got into a fight, knocking one from the tree and sending the smaller of the remaining two running and limping down the tree. My point? Possums normally run, but in city areas where man is more common it's been more my experience that they have something of a "Screw You" attitude.
While it;s true I've had more then just these encounters with these little buggers, at these moments I'm reminded that, YES at times some possums do attack.
Now this brings me to tonight. I found a young possum my Lab was barking at. I took a photo as it was in a tree, and it then growled at me, I was standing right by the branch it was on, and it didn't play dead. In fact it moved towards me. After I backed off it started to move up the tree, where it turned out that 2 other possums were hiding, they got into a fight, knocking one from the tree and sending the smaller of the remaining two running and limping down the tree. My point? Possums normally run, but in city areas where man is more common it's been more my experience that they have something of a "Screw You" attitude.
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