Friday, July 25, 2008

How Stupid Do You Think I Am?

I recently received this email via the address associated with my blog:
I'm Elmer and I work at,a company
interested in blog advertizing.I found your blog engaging and I'm contacting you to ask if you are interested in blog post sponsorship.If you are interested,kindly mail back and I'll send you pricing details, guidelines and processes.Looking forward to doing business with you.


Elmer. Dude. You don't need to pay me. I'll give you free publicity right now.

The first thing I did after reading your spam was to Google's linked to PayDay Loans , Inc. Since you have read my blog, you probably realize that the only thing I hate more than stupid people are the con men who prey on them, and predatory "payday" loan sharks are amongst the worst of that sorry lot. Normally, I would be put off by any "professional" correspondence wherein the writer failed to provide a full name, but since you are allegedly affiliated with PayDay Loans, I am willing to cut you some slack- I understand that you-as any right-thinking person would be- are ashamed of your unsavory business ethics and would therefore be reluctant to use your real name.

I also found dozens of blogs on which you had left the exact message that you sent me on their comments section, changing only the blog URL in the text. There sure are a lot of "engaging" blogs out there, Elmer. Curiously, none of those blogs had a Pacificadvance dot com 'advertizement'. (sic)

Most of the blogs I saw either scoffed at ignored your offer but I wanted to learn more...being an impatient man, I eschewed the email reply and went directly to the PacificAdvance homepage, called the toll-free number and asked for you by name. Imagine my surprise when I was told that there was no "Elmer" there! I was even more shocked to find out that they had never heard of PacificAdvance:

Operator: "Hello, FastCash. Can I have your social please?"

Me: " No, you cannot. I'd like to speak to Elmer, please."

O:"I'm sorry, you must have the wrong number."

Me: "Is this PacificAdvance?"

O: "No, this is FastCash. Can I have your Social Security number, please?"

M: "Not until I talk to Elmer."

O: "Sir, we don't have an 'Elmer' here but I'd be happy to help you with a loan."


Dude, you need to let your staff know who you are and where they are working.

If I was the skeptical sort, I'd guess that anyone who responds to your email will be presented with some enticing but fictional numbers ( get rich blogging), fanciful, vaporous sums that the lucky blogger can 'earn' merely by agreeing to let you place ads on their blog. Of course, in order to get paid, that blogger will be required to submit their tax ID info ( Social Security #, bank account # and home address)...I imagine that they may even be asked to 'temporarily' give your company administrative access to the blog itself in order to place the ad on the site. Just a guess.

I can't see this as being anything other than a scam. My blog gets almost no traffic and is extremely hostile towards scams, legal and otherwise. I have not-and never will- taken out a "PayDay" loan. There is no legitimate reason for PacificAdvance (or whoever you are) to contact me. Ever.


Have you received this come-on? Did you answer it?

Sign in as 'anonymous' if you did. I will make fun of you.


whimsical brainpan said...

You rule!

yellowdog granny said...

what a me and i'll fuck you over and take all your money...what a deal...
sigh* hope no one falls for that one..

Sprocket said...

That was hysterical. I LOVED IT that you called them. rotflmao!

ReesePie said...

oooh bastards! I'm still just getting penis enlargement emails. I can't wait to make it to the big leagues!

Allan said...

Whim- I have my moments *smiley icon*

JS- I guaran-fucking-tee you that people fall for it.

S- That's what I do at work...sigh.

R- Those penis enlargement emails are how you get to the big leagues! (No refunds, BTW)

Sling said...

I didn't get one of these messages.
Clearly,I'm just not engaging enough to satisfy them.

citizen of the world said...

I guess my blog is not engaging enough to be solicited by the glue cow. I'll just be in my room. sob

more cowbell said...

I hate Payday Loan thieves! Bastards! Hey, whatever happened w/ the jury duty? It might be too late, but my dad was a cop, and my mom, me, or sister have never gotten past the first call -- after they find out we are directly related to a law enforcement officer, it's "thank you for your time, ma'am". They think I"ll be biased. They're right, just the opposite of what they ASSume. So anyway, you can always say you're related to a cop.

Lyzard said...

My father once, while very angry, asked my brother Morgan (about 4 or 5 years old at the time) "How stupid do you think I am?" The response, was perfect...

"Very stupid Daddy."

Luckily, my father knew that by asking that question he had indeed been very stupid and laughed.

Rose DesRochers said...

Interesting to know. Oh by the way Elmer wants to pay you 5 bucks for including the link in your posts.

Rob said...

I did post a link for the ads on my other blogs and i was paid and nothing bad happened to me. I admit, I made some blogs for money... but some just want purely advertisement and nothing else just like this one.

There's nothing scam happened after I posted the link and gave them my paypal account.