Today is the first day of summer. This makes me want to travel. When traveling to a distant and exotic lands (like Baltimore or Chicago) it's important to know a few things:
What are the local liquor laws?
What languages do they speak?
What sort of internal parasites am I likely to encounter?
I found this ad on the web-looks like good stuff to have if you're tired of feeding your tapeworm. I think I have worms that feed on beer. Last night I drank ten beers and wasn't even drunk. Frustrating goddamn sobriety worms!
Anyway, if you scroll down a bit in the ad you'll read gleeful testimonials from a family that has apparently has made a household game of showing each other the dead abominations they've been leaving in the toilet. One happy camper gleefully described crapping something "the size of my hand and shaped like a rubber glove". Eeewww...
What kinds of scars are being left on these people's children?
"Hey kids! Come see what crawled out of Daddy's ass!"